Risk to create

I’m half asleep or am I alive at all? No clue to know or feel the why. Been up, been down, and now in between. Swinging around like a lantern on Halloween. My body makes shapes I’m not familiar with. It’s hard to say if it’s in pain or pleasure, the curves that it makes look the same either way. Been wanting to shout out, and write full volumes of words that mean something to us but at the end of the day, I’m left with twenty minutes to write before bed and shaking knees out of fear, because feeling I have no relevance or purpose to express. All is left unspoken, unwritten, unsung, even when it hurts me more than anyone. All these words, compositions, and sounds are trapped inside of me and it erodes me from the inside. I don’t know how long the line will last if it’s stopping and starting, or if is it the end of it all but all I know at this moment is that I’ve tried, I took a risk of a lifetime to be vulnerable, to be strong, to be weak, in front of me, and in front of you too.