Week 27. The Rainy Day Feeling

That pleasant, warming, yet a little sentimental, maybe slightly sad feeling that we get remembering the summer of our childhood, walking on a foggy sunday morning in the middle of the street because there’s no one else there but us, feeling the same type of breeze as that day we were held with unconditional love and care, seeing the night light flashes through the window as that night when we felt the excitement of being alive or something completely different, specific to you. But the feeling is there. That sweetness of a moment, followed by lightly sad understanding that it’s not possible to recreate the perfection of that moment. It’s like longing to listen to THAT song that we loved so much, forgotten and now can only remember small melodic pieces so it’s impossible to find it and bask in that sweetness again.

*If someone was wondering, while writing this week’s Read I’m listening to the song that traveled with me throughout this week “Here Comes That Rainy Day Feeling Again” by The Fortunes. Next on the list of this week’s favorites comes “Particles” by Nothing But Thieves (does anyone else notice how the bass is similar to “Jumpsuit” intro by Twenty One Pilots?)*

I personally don’t like to ruminate on things on end without any reason or objective so I will share my ponderings, my way of being when this feeling arises, fully understanding it might not be the process for everyone. If not as a tool, this could be read just as another perspective. After spending some time in the feeling, the memory, the moment I try to understand why it came up again (because it usually recurs). I got into a habit, when these feelings flush through me, I start asking myself: “What is this feeling telling me? What does it try to remind me of? What pieces of the puzzle of life I still get to collect from this memory? Maybe these pieces needed to “marinate” to mature and be “harvested” when the right time comes, when I have enough life experience to “get it”. Usually, after collecting the gold nuggets out of these memories, the feeling of a specific situation does not come back… For a good while. And sometimes, just like this week, it all comes back, all at once. Then I’m swimming in the sea of nostalgia, pensively gazing through the window, gathering deep sighs, craving for a cuppa of black tea with a dash of milk (not talking about “Bridgerton” vibes, closer to Jane Austen’s).

What vibes are holding you up this week? How do you deal with nostalgic feelings when they occur?

Have a pleasantly reminiscent week.