Week 44. Keep going
2024
10/31/20242 min read
There are times we have to be brave, clear headed and to just keep going. These are the times of higher alertness and it requires much more of us than we would be willing to give under normal circumstances. That kind of times may last from a day (say, when we’re traveling and we have to be cautious, aware, prepared and considerate) to decades for some (if we are single parents, caregivers to less independently functional loved ones or someone like that) but for some they end, for some they have to have pauses when we get to be a total mess, swim in our funk for a good minute, feel the feelings which come up as we realize how unfair and terrible things are, how we’re no longer able to keep going on. Sometimes we have to carve our beautiful mess days, hours or minutes to acknowledge how we really feel, to get mad at someone or the life in general for everything that’s going on wrong, for the short stick that we’ve got, for not having anything else left to give or to exist. Sometimes things feel so pressing because we don’t allow ourselves to grieve the alternatives, the experiences and the life we thought we would be having by now, we don’t allow ourselves to let go, stop copping and to let things fall. It usually takes a few hours of a good cry and feel-it-out session to a day or three tops to get those feelings out of the system and to restart our lives with remembrance of why we do what we do and what matters the most to us. Would not recommend to share the inner parts of this process with our loved ones or the closest to us because it’s usually quite unpleasant. Some parts of it could be about them which we wouldn’t want them to know under everyday circumstances so let’s not burn the bridges when we’re vulnerable and on the edge (just a friendly suggestion, you do you). It’s more like reckoning with ourselves and swimming in our own soup to get the most delicious broth on the other side.
After the meltdown we can see things in our life from a different angle, maybe reconsider some things, appreciate more others. In any case, when life gets tough, we can carve out some time for ourselves to be not ok, to not have all figured out, to panic a little, just to gain a new pair we did not know we had, and to take on the next day or chapter accepting ourselves as a remarkable, complex human being that we are.
Have a productive stewing.